Me Time

If you're like me, and you have a baby who only binge sleeps every couple days, you want to take advantage of that time.

It always starts the same. With a marathon "Crying, I can't be put down, I want to nurse for an hour" situation, and then his little arms fall limp, and his little mouth hangs open, and I have to feel under his nose to make sure he's still alive. Because he rarely sleeps.

Then I rock him and rock him until I'm sure he's good and out, and then I slowly lower him into his swing, and off of my arm,  like a teenage magician trying to pull out a table cloth from under fine china.

I turn his swing on warp speed and back away slowly.

IT'S MEEEEEEEE TIMEEEEEE...

Most days I clean the house, or organize cupboards. Some days I shower, or read a month old magazine.

Other days, when I'm feeling lazy and self righteous, I slip on my pillowy terry cloth robe, and act like I am pretty woman in the pent house. Without the whore part.
I belly up to the mirror and with a fistful of concealer, dab away the bags from my eyes. I shade my lids in metallic earth tones, and dust blush over my cheek bones.
I feel lovely.
So I pose for a few bathroom mirror-white robe glamour shots. Which are totally badass. Then I take a few mental pictures.

Boom!!

When I'm done with that, I poke my head out of the bathroom door like a mere cat and make sure the baby is still sleeping happily away. I don't feel done quite yet, so I work on my toes. It's totally important to paint my toenails. It's winter in Michigan, so I never take my socks off. Except for to sleep. I hope my sheets like the look of turquoise piggies, because they are the only ones who will see them. 

"I need this" I tell myself. "I have to look amazing while I stay inside to take care of the baby all day"

I don't know about you, but it makes me feel better. 

Make up: Check!

Painted toes: Check!

What else do I love that I can't do while the baby is awake? Oh yeah...EAT! 

So I float past my little sleeping sweetheart in the living room and look into the fridge like a homeless man against the window of a fine restaurant. I've become weird about food. Because I never get to eat when I feel like it, I will now eat side dishes like they are entrees, and I will be totally cool about it. 

So I break into a vat of sweet potatoes, and dump in a half pound of feta cheese. It actually tastes pretty fabulous. Gotta post that shit on Facebook. 

Why is it, anytime I bring food to my mother in law's, it comes back untouched? They totally love me. Just not my food apparently. 

Even though the baby is still sleeping, I eat my food like I'm in a pie eating contest, or I'm full of jet fuel. It's just become a bad habit of mine. I really wish I could break it. 

It feels so awesome to have a full belly. It feels so awesome to have some down time. Even though the house is a mess. 

"I need this" I tell myself again, as I stretch out onto the couch. I rub my legs back and forth over each other and lay my head down to rest. My body starts humming with the effervescent twighlight of sleep. 

I nod out in less than 7 seconds, no shit. 

As soon as I do, Jace wakes up. He's well rested and ready to rock and roll. 

I have a small temper tantrum inside of my head.

It's then I realize maybe today, my priorities are juuuuust a little skewed.